Easter

I have to put together the girl's easter basket at some point. I have the Easter crap, the basket, the grass...it's the assembly that will be put off until Saturday night - much like how her Christmas presents get wrapped mere hours before she unwraps them.

I'm not religious, but I like the holidays because they give me a chance to make a day special for the girl. You know how that excites me. I haven't believed in God since the 5th grade and truthfully, the girl just found out who God was this year because of the man. Yes, the man decided to give my child religious beliefs. I'm not allowed to be mad at him for that, he says.

Girl: Mom, did you know that God created everything around us?

Me: I didn't know.

Girl: It's true, that building, that person...that squirrel...God created EVERYTHING.

Me: I think construction workers created the building...

Girl: NO!

Me: Listen woman, we live in a country where it is okay to believe whatever you want to believe. So if that is what you believe, I am fine with it.

Girl: Do you believe it?

Me: No.

Girl: Can't you just believe the same as me Mom?!?!

Me: Fine...I believe God mixed cement and stacked brick for that building...

Girl: Thanks, Mom.

Later, in another one of her startling revelations, she told me the Easter bunny wasn't real. (Just in case you're taking notes, God is in, Easter bunny - out.) Apparently, she says bunnies are not that big and so clearly the Easter bunny is just a man in a bunny suit that breaks into your house to hide chocolate and eggs. This is not disturbing to her in any way whatsoever.