Rage

How come women can find things and men can't?

How come my man doesn't even know what's in his own house? He will call me and ask me where something is in HIS house!

How come if I tell him EXACTLY where his mystery item is, he still can't see it?!

Man: Where's the soda? You said you had soda for me?

Me: It's on the top shelf, baby, next to the juice.

Man: No, it's not. You don't have soda.

Me: I bought it for you. It's a new bottle. It's big and says "Diet Pepsi" on it and it's next to the juice.

Man: I don't see it.

Me: It's THERE!

Man: ...nope.

...I reluctantly get up and look myself...

...and do you know what?

IT'S RIGHT FUCKING THERE ON THE TOP FUCKING SHELF NEXT TO THE MOTHER FUCKING JUICE

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!KILL!!!!!!YOU!!!!!!!DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love him, lots.